Finding the perfect place to live is not that different to finding that special someone to share your life with, when you think about it. Both are incredibly important decisions, guaranteed to get your emotions and expectations running high, and it might feel like you have to go through hundreds of options before you find the right one.
With everything being done online these days, you’ve got an overwhelming number of options and it can be tough knowing how to whittle them down. And to make matters worse, there is plenty of room for deception and misrepresentation whether you’re looking for a pad or a partner. Just like you spend ages deliberating over the most flattering profile pic you can find, people will tidy up a house and make sure the lighting is just right before snapping away.
And as for the descriptions people add… well, more about those later.
Online messaging will only get you so far; in the end you need to start meeting people face to face. It’ll take time, patience, and a bit of luck to find the right match, and you’ll probably be left with some funny stories to tell about your experiences along the way.
We hope these seven dating tips will make finding the right place to live a bit easier for you.
1. Stick to your dealbreakers.
Start by working out your must-haves and your absolute no-nos, and stick to them no matter what. Once you get tied up in the excitement of seeing a place you might try to convince yourself that it wouldn’t be SO bad to have a housemate that plays drums, or that the 30-minute walk to the bus stop will do you good, but your future self will thank you for sticking to your principles.
2. Work out the kind of relationship you’re after.
Having a roommate who thinks the same way as you can be the difference between your new bff and the person who makes you late for work every morning because you don’t dare set foot outside your room until they’ve left the house. Some key things to consider are: Do you want your home to be the place everyone comes to party, or would you rather socialise elsewhere? Do you want your housemates to become a big part of your life or would you prefer to keep them at a friendly distance? Are you happy with the way the house is decorated and furnished, or do you want some flexibility to add a touch of your own? Make sure you discuss these things with any potential roommates before making a decision.
3. Don’t go by the pictures alone.
People can get creative with their photography. The chair strategically placed to cover the hole in the wall. The low lighting that conceals the hideous wallpaper. And the housemates that spent a day cleaning and tidying, took the photos, and then let the house return to its previous slovenly state. If at all possible, visit a place in person before committing to take it.
4. Read between the lines.
Beware the room described as a “small double” which can fit a double bed in IF you remove all the other furniture. Similarly, a “laid-back” household may just be one that doesn’t own any cleaning products. And a place that seems to have a high turnover of housemates should raise a red flag in the same way as a date who tells you about the other three relationships he’s been through in the last month. There’s got to be a reason why people keep leaving!
5. Get face to face and ask about the things that matter.
One of the great things about us humans is we all have different tastes. What’s right for someone else won’t necessarily be right for you, so once you get to meet your future roommates, ask them the things that are important to you. What time do they get up? How safe is the area? What’s the landlord like? Will they let you watch your favourite TV show every week in the lounge? Is the pizza shop round the corner any good? You know, the stuff that matters. The questions you ask will also give them an idea of the kind of roommate you’ll be.
6. However desperate you feel, remember point 1.
After weeks or even months of looking for a place, it’s easy to feel like giving up. You might start re-visiting places you initially crossed off your list, or trying to talk your way into a household where they know just as well as you do that it’s not meant to be. That cat allergy is not going to disappear through sheer will, so keep looking until you find somewhere where all the residents have two legs.
7. Don’t get tied down with attaching labels to people
Everyone has different measures of what makes someone “quiet”, “clean”, or “responsible”. The person who “likes to keep the place tidy” might surprise you on your first morning with a detailed cleaning rota. A housemate might define themselves as “sociable” purely because they spend every evening in the communal area. The fact that they’re glued to the TV and don’t say a word is unimportant. Be led by your gut instinct rather than by what you’ve read.
If all else fails, remember that you haven’t signed your life away (not very much of it, anyway) and you can always call it a day and find someone else. With each unsuccessful encounter, you’ll learn more about what makes your ideal home.
